My Knee

May 3, 2024

I needed my carry-on suitcase to pack some things for a trip. I got a ladder so I could get the suitcase down from the loft where it lives. I’ve done this many times before, going up on the ladder, getting the suitcase, and handing it down to Xan. But this time I slipped and fell off the ladder. The result was multiple fractures to my right knee and difficulty with my bladder, difficulty peeing. At Dominican Hospital, Dr. Damian Smith, urologist, inserted a catheter (folks at Watsonville Community Hospital had tried 5x and failed, with pain each time). My knee was operated on by Dr. Abidi, surgeon (Watsonville). All successful. I got 3 days of good care.

May 7, 2024

I was transferred to Santa Cruz Post Urgent Care. I’ve been here ever since.

Follow up visits to both Smith and Abidi showed positive results. Smith installed a catheter and foley, and Abidi’s assistant, Ray, said the knee looked fine and just needed time for healing.

The staff here is great. They take me to their gym, where they work me hard, as I want to be worked. The more I work the closer I get to being able to go home.

Progress is slow and sometimes exhausting, but I do make progress every day, so I’m confident that I’ll be going home in the not too distant future.

The knee will take some time to heal. And by and by the catheter and foley will be able to be removed and I’ll be able to pee on my own. Meanwhile, there’s no pain, just some discomfort when I move in certain ways.

And there are lots of sleepless nights, or nights with only very partial sleep. Ambien and other meds give me about five hours of good sleep before they wear off. Then I toss and turn with discomfort, lots of thoughts, and an occasional bit of sleep. In all, I get perhaps six hours of sleep a night, short of the 7 to 8 hours a night that I aim for. I compensate by drinking coffee and dozing a bit during the day.

I’m getting lots of visitors. Xan visits me every day. She’s here by my side as I’m writing this. Eric, who lives only three blocks away from here, comes at least once a day, sometimes twice. Gail is here frequently. And there are others. They brighten my day.

The MMC community has been wonderfully supportive. They’ve provided transportation for getting Xan down here to see me each day and for getting her back up to the MMC at the end of the afternoon. Arpita does a great job of coordinating all that.

The food is pretty good and I get plenty of rest when I’m not working out at the gym.

I am so, so looking forward to being back with my sweetheart. And that will happen before too long.

May 30, 2024

I have appointments to see Doctors Abidi and Smith on June 17 and 18. I’m hopeful – no guarantees – that both will say I’m ready to go home.

We’ll see.

June 6, 2024

The wound nurse unwrapped and looked over my leg today, and said it looks just fine.

I was tested today and came out positive for Covid. I can't leave here for the next 10 days.

Fortuitously, that means I can leave here for my two appointments on June 17 and 18th.

June 9, 2024

Of the three beds in this room, mine is the one by the window. The view out the window is lovely. There is a Black Eyed Pea Vine that is unlike anything I’ve ever seen. Beautiful. And there are trees and the sky beyond.

So there’s the bad and the good. The accident and all the difficulty that has followed, together with all the things that are nourishing and supporting me.

In the end, there is just acceptance, appreciation, and gratitude.

June 12, 2024

Greg, in an outraged storm of anger, blame, and long story-telling, finally decided to leave AMA. Fighting with most everyone to the end. (Not with me; we stayed positive).

At the same time, my urine didn’t go down the catheter-foley, but dribbled out from the catheter-penis connection onto by body and pants. Nurse Hector had me push the catheter in a little, then wait-see. It happened again, but Hector doubted me — told me next time don’t stop it, just let it go and there’ll be clear evidence one way or the other — and then we can consider what, if anything, to do.

Waiting to see.


The foley has been filling and there’s no wetness at my crotch, so things seem to be working as they should. Turns out there’s no problem.

June 14, 2024

The wound nurse tells me my leg is looking good, and the catheter/foley is working well. The next BIG step is this Monday and Tuesday, the 17th and 18th, when I have appointments with the two doctors — Abidi, The surgeon who operated on my right knee, and Smith, the urologist who installed the catheter/foley. If — BIG IF —Abidi says the right leg steel fixator can be removed, and Smith says the catheter/foley can be removed and I can pee on my own, then I could be going home after those two appointments — say on or about June 20th. No telling about that big if, but I’m excited that there’s the possibility that I could be going home soon.

June 15, 2024

I tested positive for Covid June 5th. Today is the 15th, 10 days after I tested positive. The period of seclusion (confinement to my room) ends 10 days after testing positive, so I’m free to leave my room. I can, for example, go down the hall to a shower room to get a delicious shower, or go outside to spend time with a visitor. Yay!

Feeling liberated!

June 16, 2024

Yesterday I used my freedom-from-seclusion to leave my room and, in a wheelchair pushed by Eric, go with him to a sunny outdoor area. We sat by a large enclosure housing dozens of parakeets chattering away as they flew about. Felt great to be out in the sun and fresh air. Later in the day I did the same thing with Xan. Again, a pleasure.

I’m feeling good despite my physical difficulties.. I’m deeply appreciative of all the support I’m getting from friends, family, and fellowship members. The visits from Eric, Xan, Gail and others from near and far lift my spirits. The many notes, texts, and emails expressing caring/concern A list of people ready to step into driving when Gail is not available. People who ask what they can bring me or do for me. Eric, for example, has provided soy sauce, packets of my favorite tea, and sani-wipes. A longtime friend brought me some cake. People have offered to bring special meals to me, which I would accept if I weren’t as pleased as I am with the meals provided by this facility. And the fact that I’m seeing clear evidence of my physical progress, thanks to the excellent physical therapy I’m getting.

Tomorrow, Monday, I have my appointment with the surgeon who operated on my right knee. I’m hopeful and anxious, looking at the possibility that he’ll say my knee is sufficiently healed that the steel fixator can be removed and I can go home (with lots of cautions and provisos). Or he may say no, I need more time at this rehab facility, more time for healing, before I can go home. We’ll see.


Xan and I have been visited by some special guests. Xan’s two sisters, Molly and Rebecca, came and stayed in our guest space, Studio B. Molly came from Hawaii and Rebeca came from Alabama! So good to see the 3 sisters having a great time together. Then, right after Molly and Rebecca left, Nancy and Bryan came from Colorado.and also stayed in Studio B. Nancy is my longtime friend Jim’s daughter. Shyama and I visited them some years ago as part of our RV trip around the county. Two lovely younger people doing good work in the world.

We’re honored to have such visitors as these four coming from such distances to see us.

June 17, 2024

Today was an important day — I had my appointment with Dr. Abidi, the surgeon who did the repair of my fractured right knee. Xan, Eric, Gail, and I went to the appointment. The leg was unwrapped and inspected, x-rays were taken, and the judgment was clear: healing had gone well and it was time for the fixator, the steel brace keeping my left from bending (and thereby damaging the surgical repair to the knee), to come off.

Taking the x-rays involved some pain, moving the leg this way and that so x-rays from different angles could be taken. Removing the brace was yet more painful. The brace was secured to my leg by screws embedded in the leg bones. Taking the steel rod off and removing the screws from the leg was painful — and great, because the hardware, the brace, is off and history!

A big step forward on the road to being able to go home.

The next big step may happen tomorrow. I have an appointment with Dr. Smith, the urologist who installed the catheter-and-foley in me. When I pee, day or night, the pee automatically goes down the catheter into the foley (container), which is emptied a few times a day. I don’t have to think about it at all. But I can’t go home until the catheter-foley can be removed and I can pee, and control my pee, on my own. In tomorrow’s appointment with Dr. Smith he’ll test me to see if I can do that. If yes (big if), I’ll be cleared to go home.

There’s still more to do. I’m back at Santa Cruz Post Acute rehab care, where I need to work with the physical therapy folks on gradually, little by little, bending the leg a bit. I need to work on some other things, too — like my ability to accomplish transfers (e.g. from bed to wheelchair) with minimal help. The criterion is clear: I can go home when the doctor at rehab judges that I can be at home safely.

So there’s still work to do, but what happened today was a big step toward going home.

I’m feeling confident and happy. Going home will take more work, but it’s on the horizon, a lot closer than before.

June 18, 2024

Another landmark success day — appointment with the urologist. Bottom line: I can go home with a catheter-foley, then return for minor outpatient surgery to install a more permanent catheter port. Skipping over the details, the important thing for me is that from the urology point of view, I can go home. Since that’s also true from the surgical point of view, now that the fixator was removed, I’m good to go home medically. The only remaining requirement is that the physical therapy people here at the Post Acute Care facility put me through some paces to the point where they’re satisfied that I can be home safely — e.g., that I can navigate the wheelchair, execute transitions, take care of my toileting and self-care needs, etc. — that I can do safely all the things I’ll need to do at home.

There’s more to the process — insurance authorization, ordering and getting the wheelchair, training on getting into and out of the car, prescriptions for various meds, etc. All of that probably will take about 3-4 days to a week — and then home I go!


It’s official. I’m going to be discharged and going home this Friday midday-ish. That’s just 3 days from now. Just had to share the news with my sweetheart right away. Both of us elated.

Eric’s been “carrying the ball down the field” while I applaud gratefully from the stands. He’s doing all the coordinating/arranging — everything from the delivery of my wheelchair Friday morning to arranging support people to come help me once I’m home to prescriptions for meds to rearranging the furniture in the house to make it easier for me to get around. He’s do dedicated, competent, and on top of it. I’m so blessed, to have such a son.

And 3 days from now I’ll be home with my love. 🙏💗 Joy! Joy! Joy!

June 21, 2024

When I leave here later today it will be exactly 7 weeks since I fell off the ladder. It’s been a long pull, helped by lots of support from friends and family and lots of good care from the health professionals

Excitement and activity increased yesterday as we prepared for my going home.

Eric, Gail, Xan, and I, joined by one of the physical therapy staff, ran through a session on transferring from a wheelchair to a car and visa versa. I was able to do those transfers — safely and without pain —without help from others, and without using additional equipment.

Sabita, the wound nurse, gave Eric, Xan, and me a demonstration and lesson in unwrapping, caring for, and wrapping the injured right leg. Eric took notes and videos we can rely on as we do these things for ourselves in the future.

The head of social services went over with me and completed my discharge papers.

We learned that there’s a $200/day co-pay here at Santa Cruz Post Urgent Care after the first 20 days. Since I will have been here 45 days, I’ll owe $5,000.

And now it’s Friday morning. Eric will be coming for me and taking me home.

Mix of emotions and thoughts. Saying goodbye to this little room and I’ve come to feel comfortable in and like. The black-eyed susan vine just outside my window, a friend and guardian spirit. The view of the trees and sky. Having an especially good dinner last night, my last dinner here. Looking forward to meals at home, especially breakfasts, which Xan and I make together in a nice dance — she as veggie-sausage woman and me as cereal man. Adding fruits and nuts - yum. How it will be to be in each others’ arms, to live our daily lives together again … Ahhh …

June 24, 2024

Ah, so good to be home after 7 weeks away. The sun, the birds, this fine house, temperature control, MMC food, the familiar/comfortable, and, above all, to be back to daily life with my sweetheart. Both of us so happy, in heaven.